Aaahahahaha! The only thing worse than the end of act II “silly misunderstanding” breakup is the “I love you too much and I need to protect my vulnerable been-cheated-on-once-boo-hoo-hoo heart!” breakup.

If a plot twist is a misunderstanding that two four-year-olds could sort out with a single phone conversation, it fails.

Don’t even get me started on “I’m violently pushing everyone away while sulking about how lonely I am!”